Traumatized Children in the Family

 Traumatized Children in the Family

Pr. Lupakisyo M .Mwakasweswe

 BATH. PGDE. MSC Psychology

 Introduction

 According to Andrews (2010), when a child experiences a traumatic upbringing where they are deprived of predictability, trust, nurturing, love and hope, childhood becomes toxic, unpredictable and abusive. Their world may be witness to violence, crime, drugs and a parental style that is full of ridicule, fear and insults. Following a trauma experience, an individual may begin to perceive the world as an unsafe place, living in a state of constant arousal. This can result in changes in the brain, which are triggered by stress functions and may alter the way we view others and ourselves. As our perceptions shape our behaviors, if the world or those around us are perceived as unsafe, this may result in an increase in anxiety or aggression, altering or impairing contact with others (Steele & Raider, 2009). According to Perry (2001), the most significant relationship in a child’s life is the attachment to their primary caregiver, acting as an emotional template for future relationships. When it is conflict-ridden, with rejection typically at the core, the outcome may lead to fragile foundations for future relationships. Mate (2008), suggests that individuals with addictions are constantly seeking something outside of themselves to alleviate their insatiable need for relief and need for relief and fulfillment. It is as a result of this longing and emptiness that individuals pursue substances or other self-harming or self-soothing behaviors, with the hope that it will provide some relief. Andrews (2010), further supports this notion in stating that children who have been neglected early in life will experience future life from the understanding of the need to fight for survival at every level, physically, emotionally, spiritually and psychologically. It is out of this fight for survival the litany of behaviors begins, behaviors that will temporarily give relief from fear and the pain that they suffer.

 Reference 

 Andrews, E. (2010). Being trauma informed [power point slides]. St. Catharine, Ontario, Canada.

 Mate, G. (2008). In the realm of the hungry ghost: Close encounters with addiction. Toronto, Ontario, Canada: Random House.

 Perry, B. D., & Szalavitz, M. (2008). The boy who was raised as a dog: and other stories from a child psychiatrist’s notebook. New York, NY:

 Basic Books. Schore, A. N., (2001). Effects of a secure attachment relationship on right brain development, affect regulation, and infant mental health. Infant Mental Health Journal, Volume22 (1- 2), 7-66. S& Raider,

TABIA

TABIA MBAYA NA TABIA NZURI

Tabia ya mwanadamu ina sura nyingi , kila mtu anajinsi alivyo zaliwa au kujifunza . katika somo hili tutakua tukiangalia mambo yanayo fanana kati ya tabia mbaya na tabia nzuri, na mwisho wa somo hili utagundua kwamba tabia yako iko katika hali gani n ahapo utaweza kufanya maamuzi ya kufikiria tofauti

Tabia huwa inajitokeza mara kwa mara unaweza ukasema mimi tabia yangu haiwezi kufahamika, lakini tabia yako iwe mbaya au nzuri mtu mwingine ataifahamu kwa sababu itajitokeza mara kwa mara, waweza kuwa mvutaji wa sigara, au mnywaji wa pombe, au madawa ya kulevya au mwizi au mtu mkarimu, mcheshi,nk hivi vyote vinajidhihirisha mara kwa mara.

Tabia yako iwe mbaya au nzuri , mtu mwingine aweza kuifahamu kwa sababu haihitaji nguvu nyingi kugundua jinsi ulivyo katika jamii, hivyo itategemea jinsi unavyo penda ufahamike. Mtu aweza kusema kuna haja gani kufahamika? ulimwengu huu unahitaji watu wa pekee ambao watakuwa msaada kwa familia , makanisani, Maofisi ya serikali, nk. watu watapenda kupata wasifu wako, usishangae unaomba kazi mahali unakataliwa , hii ni jinsi ulivo amua kuyaweka maisha yako kwa hiyo ni vyema ukaanza kutengeneza tabia yako iliisomeke kwa faida yako na ya jamii.

Tabia yako inatambulisha nini kipo ndani yako. Ni rahisi mtu kujua tabia iliyomo ndani yako kabla haijajitokeza, kumekuwepo wakati fulani mtu hataki kuonekana kwamba yeye ni mtu wa aina fulani, kile unacho waza kinajidhihirisha katika mwenendo wako wa kila siku. Mtu fulani ,yawezekana ni mchumba wako au mwenzi wako ni rahisi kukujua ulivyo ndani ya moyo wako. Fanya tofauti ili watu wakufahamu msaada wako katika jamii unayoishi, kama nilivyo sema katika kichwa cha habari , hizi ni tabia zinazo fanana kati ya tabia nzuri na mbaya. 

Tabia mbaya au nzuri ina hatari ya kuongezeka kidogo kidogo na kukua kwa nguvu katika maisha, na kuacha inakuwa na shida au kuendelea nayo na kukupatia sifa njema katika jamii. kama wewe ni mvutaji wa bangi tabia hii itakua kila siku na kuwa sugu katika maisha, kama labda ni mtu unayependa kusoma neno la Mungu, tabia hiyo inaweza kukuwa sana na ukawa mtu wa mafanikio katia jumuia yako, watu watafanya maamuzi ya kuwa nawe au la. Anza kufanya majaribio ya kuwa na tabia njema utashangaa inakuwa na kukuwa kuwa kubwa sana na kila mtu atakuita heri katika dunia hii.

Tabia njema au mbaya ina leta faida kwa mtu mwenyewe au inaleta furaha, inakufanya ufurahie kadri inavyo kuwa sehemu ya maisha yako, yawezekana kabisa unapenda ngono, mahusiano yasiyo salama kati ya jinsia ya kike na ya kiume, kwa sasa imefikia watu wa jinsia moja kuwa na mahusiano ya ngono, hii siyo ajabu , wa kristo wanasema kwa sababu ya kuongezeka maasi, upendo wa wengi utapoa, Watu wengi leo wameamua kutenda kunyume na Mungu na hii ndiyo inaitwa dhambi, kwa kweli ukianza tabia yeyote huwa inaleta furaha , mtu ataifurahia sana lakini mwisho wake ni maangamizi,. Endapo utaamua kufurahia kuwa mtu wa kujifunza neno la Mungu utajikuta unafuraha sana katika maisha  na utagundua kwamba Mungu anakubariki sana.

 Tutaendelea...